Sex & Porn Addiction Recovery

You’re scared, angry, ashamed, and lost. You wish this would all just go away. The life you thought you had (or others think you have), the life you’ve been building for years, is crashing down around you. It feels like you’re losing everything. You’ve betrayed the person you love most and, more than that, you’ve betrayed yourself. You find yourself thinking, “How did this happen? How did it get so bad? What was I thinking?!? This is all my fault.” And if your partner hasn’t found out your secret yet, you’re terrified that they will.

There is hope for you here. You can escape the vicious cycle of sexual compulsivity and shame. You can be honest with yourself and regain the respect you long for. You can have a healthy, awesome, intimate sex life with a partner who knows and loves you as you are.

Am I A Sex Addict?

• Are you preoccupied with sexual thoughts/fantasies?

• Are you ashamed of some of your sexual behaviors or do you hide some of your behaviors from others?

• Have you looked into treatment for sexual issues? Have you sought couples counseling when you knew that you weren’t being honest about your sex life?

• Is your sexual behavior hurtful to others (including partner, work, or social life)?

• Do you feel like your sexual desires control you? Do you feel out of control?

• Does your sexual behavior make you feel sad or in despair?

If you answered yes to some of these questions, you are most likely a sex addict. But don’t let a label get in your way. Some people call it sexual compulsivity or out of control sexual behavior. The label is not as important as the impact of this behavior on your life.

When Sex & Porn Addiction Destroys Your Career

You worked really hard to get where you are. In many ways, you’re at the top of your game. But secretly, you feel like a fraud. You may have the respect of your colleagues and the envy of your friends, but no ones knows your secrets. They’d think differently if they knew the real you.

Lately, you can’t concentrate at work. You’re used to be on top of things, but this obsession has taken over your life. You keep trying to go without looking at porn or compulsively checking your text messages or secret email account. But sometimes, you plan your day around sex. You miss meetings and deadlines; you can’t even keep track of all the excuses you’ve given. Maybe you’ve been caught and you’re on probation at work. Yet, despite this, you still can’t seem to stop.

When Sex Addiction Kills Your Relationship

Maybe work is just fine, but your relationship is a mess. Before your partner found out, you tried really hard to hide it. You used incognito tabs and cleared your history daily. You told her she was crazy for being suspicious for “no reason.” You lied about being late. You hid money you didn’t want her to know you’d spent on sex. You had credit cards she didn’t know about. You had a secret phone, messaging app, or dating profile. You told yourself it wasn’t a big deal because it was “just sex.”

And after your partner found out, the questions came flooding in. Hundreds of questions. Anger you could never have imagined. Panic, shame, disgust, rage, grief. She’s brokenhearted and devastated. And you can’t bear to see the damage you’ve caused, but it confronts you every day. How do you answer all these questions? Should you even answer these questions? What do you do now? How do you rebuild this broken trust?

Recovering From Sexual Addiction

I help men, women, and couples heal from sexual compulsivity and intimate betrayal. For those who struggle with out of control sexual behavior, we start by getting a clear view of the impact of sex addiction on your life. Denial is powerful and will keep you stuck in the addiction cycle. Confronting the destruction of sex addiction is the first step to recovery and healing.

I work with you to identify your unhealthy sexual behaviors, the triggers for those behaviors, and the healthy coping skills you can start using instead. We’ll work on building a healthy, active support system as you learn what life in recovery looks like for you. One of the biggest problems with sex addiction (and all addiction) is isolation. You can’t do this on your own. You’ve tried that already, remember? Reaching out to a community of support and understanding is deeply healing and provides encouragement and wisdom as you learn to live a sober life.